Parental Pressure: The consequences and how this will affect the Parent-Child Relationship by Imogen

The apprehensive parents crowd around the small window to anxiously observing the daughters. The girls try to look away and forget about their mothers’ judgmental glares. After class the constant criticizing and critiquing begins.

The issue of parental pressure has been around for a long time but it is being ignored. The consequences of parents pushing their children to excel worse than many think. Children become detached from their parents and their relationships become damaged.
Most pushy parents say they only want what is best for their child but how are they doing what is best for their child? Dr. Paul Stricker from the American Academy of Pediatrics say that we have to really evaluate the problem learn want the children really want.

“We have to ask what we really want for our kids. Do we want them to be happy? Do we want them to feel empowered, to have social lives and agency in their life decisions?” Many parents think they know what is best for their child but it isn’t always the case.

Thursday night at City Ballet Academy, a pushy mother is caught arguing with her daughter in the reception who has just finished her class.
“When is my break?” an eleven year old screamed at her mother.
“You don’t get a break” The mother responded.
“My solo is really tiring! I need to a break, I can’t do that much!” The girl screamed back.
“We will talk more in the morning,” The mother replied. THe pair then trucked out reception however the constant mumble could still be heard.

Would you want a mother like this? According to Daniel Bates from The Daliy Mail “helicopter” parents are more likely to end up pushing their child away from them.

“Children of pushy parents are more likely to reject them in later life, a study has found.Boys and girls born to ‘helicopter mums’ grow up being resentful of all the pressure that has been piled on them in their youth.”

Burning out their children isn’t the only problem pushy parents face. Children want to be free to make their own choices. According to Lead researcher Jean Ispa, a human development professor at the University of Missouri, said: ‘It looks like children just don’t like to be with their mothers as much if mothers are highly controlling.

‘That is not a good thing. Ten-year-olds should enjoy being with their mother.’ Parents are becoming too involved in their children’s lives. A study by the Johns Hopkins Centre of Talented Youth conducted a survey over 800 families with talented students. In the first year of study the parents were asked about their school involvement and the importance of achievement. Results show that 85.5% of the parents of children in grade 5 were being either somewhat involved (45.5%) or heavily involved (40%) in their child’s school. Also 78.6% of the parents were part of the local PTA. Do parents really need to be so heavily involved in their children’s lives from such a young age?

All in all, Helicopter parents are creating negative consequences for they are pushing their children away and the parents end up damaging the parent-child relationship. As well as the children do not enjoy spending time with their parents if they controlling for some parents are heavily involved in the child’s life and the child want freedom.